


Love at the Darkest Hour

by anassa_anemou



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Angst, Canon Compliant, M/M, Marauders' Era, Post-Hogwarts, Slice of Life, Unhappy Ending
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-03
Updated: 2015-07-03
Packaged: 2018-04-07 11:14:11
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,854
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4261251
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/anassa_anemou/pseuds/anassa_anemou
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Remus and Sirius move in together, also does the war, the relationship issues and the raging certainty happy times may not come.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Love at the Darkest Hour

**Author's Note:**

  * For [tigrrmilk](https://archiveofourown.org/users/tigrrmilk/gifts).



It’s funny enough how Remus didn’t ask for a reason: he never does, not when Sirius gets that glint - the glint means Sirius won’t take no for an answer. While they were at Hogwarts Sirius only left Remus convince him to sleep when it was convenient but when he should really stop and listen, he would go forward. 

 

“Fuck.” Sirius flops to his side, and Remus tries to catch his breath. “What a way to start!” 

 

Remus sighs, he really shouldn’t indulge Sirius, but he prefers fucking in the living room, than having a party to celebrate them moving together. With his wand he murmurs a quick spell to clean them and starts to move, thinking about getting some tea, when Sirius’ hand in his chest stops him. 

 

“Just stay still for ten minutes and I’ll do your tea while you take a bath.” Remus stays, even if Sirius won’t do such thing. “Prongs sent his patronus, he and Lily will come tomorrow, so I’m thinking we could do some food and use the butterbeer I stole from Lucius.” 

 

“I thought I won the right of a quiet week.” Remus turns to look at Sirius, eyes half lidded. 

 

“Yeah, yeah. It’s just them, maybe Peter. You cook, I drink and then they help painting this room, maybe yours too.” 

 

Of course Sirius would want to paint the wall Muggle style. They argued about it, when Remus thought Sirius was joking about them moving together, a few weeks before the school was over. Sirius wanted to have genuine memories of turning their bachelor pad into a home, or so he yelled at Remus one or two times. 

 

“I’m taking a shower, you clean up the floor.” Sirius saunters to his room, and Remus rolls his eyes. 

 

Sirius will never change, he should’ve accepted the job in Germany - a lot of dark wizards, a hideous one room apartment, but a life without Sirius Black eccentricity. Lily would fall of the couch laughing if she was hearing this - as if he could leave without Sirius. 

*******

“Knock it off, Pads, I`m trying to read.“ Remus smiles despite it, because Sirius roaming around the room, steading fur for sure, but still prancing around. 

Remus always liked Sirius in his animagus form, even if he gets slobbered by saliva. So he lets the big dog lay down by his side and starts scratching behind his ears. Padfoot almost purrs, whining in pleasure. They stay that way, until Remus wakes up with the sound of the book hitting the floor, Sirius is back to his human form face jammed into Remus belly. 

“I can hear you thinking, shut up and snuggle me.“ Sirius voice is grave with sleep and Remus obeys, pretending not to feel the trill that goes to the back of his neck. 

This time, Remus thanks that he lives with Sirius and not in some horrible slum. 

 

 *******

 

“Are you guys ok?” Lily scrubs her arms in the bathroom sink and Remus sits at the toilet, brushing his teeth. 

 

“Hu, well I’m ok, just feeling a bit corned, Sirius is everywhere, all the time.” Lily smiles at him and continues to scrub her skin, she been pretty happy in helping them painting, even if James wanted her to rest, preferably with her feet up. “Sirius been acting weird, more weird than usual at least.” 

 

“We are all stressed out, James been driving me up the wall. It’s not like the baby sucked my brain, I’m pregnant, not stupid.” Lily waves her hands and wets Remus slightly. “Sorry.” 

 

“James was always a sneaky worrier, I can’t imagine how he is feeling after you guys and Sirius did the Fidelius last week. Besides you are almost popping. ” 

 

Lily smacks both her hands in Remus face, one on each side, mock frowning. They don’t mention that James isn’t being paranoid for no reason, they don’t talk about how Sirius and James had missions that take days and leave them bleeding or that Remus, himself, went to the seediest bars in the Magical World, looking for allies. There is a war raging outside their warded homes after all. 

 

“Sirius is probably just stressed, James been bothering him to get laid.” Lily says it with a smirk and Remus looks to the bathtub, it’s been years since he blushed when Lily made some sort of comment about his love life, but he and Sirius were complicated. 

 

“Remus!” Sirius yells, Lily cackles and Remus really wants to hide in the tub and pretend nothing is happening. 

 

 *******

 

When Harry is born, Sirius is even more horny than Remus could imagine, they fuck on the counter, just as James’ patronus dissipates and they fuck again in empty room at St. Mungus. The baby is very cute, but Remus refuses to pick him up, Sirius is delighted, making faces and singing and stealing him when Lily is asleep - it’s not very hard to chose the kid’s godfather after that. 

*******

Lily brings Harry on a afternoon, his bright green eyes follow them all around, chubby hands trying to grab Remus wand, where he is creating fog puppets. Sirius is delighted that Remus been warming up to the baby and he even giggles in glee when Harry throws up in Remus robe when he finally picks the kid up.

“Good thing I'm not having kids.“ Remus laughs at the face Sirius glamoured to spook Harry. 

“Why not? You would be a great dad.“ Sirius looks back at him, a small smile in his face. 

“You know I won't take the risk of passing this on. And after we decided to be ok, I thought...“ Remus leans his chest into Sirius` back, hugging him and looking at Harry smiling face. 

“We could be great dads together.“ Sirius says it with a tilt of his head and Remus can see his smirk. “Or we could just pretend all is well and continue to fuck like bunnies all over the house. “

“And that right there is why I thank god you two found each other. No children will be traumatized by your sexual appetite and I`ll have great babysitters forever.“ Lily pokes at Remus cheek, her eyes soft as she sees Sirius picking Harry up to cuddle him against his chest. 

“Oh, I`ll love to have Harry over more times, I just won`t have him over night, because that is Remus` time.“  
“Shut up, Sirius.“ Remus rubs his face against the back of Sirius neck and kisses him there.

 *******

 

“Make me a cup?” Sirius drapes himself over the couch and Remus doesn’t even bother to yell at him for getting blood all over the couch or the fact he could take a shower before lying there. 

 

“You look like crap.” 

 

“You aren’t much better.” Remus gives him the cup, two sugars and no cream. 

 

They stay silent, Remus is desperately in need of dreamless sleep potion or maybe a really hard punch to the face. He didn’t go to sleep, waiting for Sirius, despite being so tired. It’s the same with Lily, he always sends patronus, hoping she and Harry are well, while James is out. 

 

“I’ll go alone the next time, James is staying at the house with Lily now; Dumbledore and the Order been picking up movement in Godric’s Hollow.” Sirius is clipped, his voice low and hollow. 

 

“The giants are restless and the werewolves I visit last week are on his side.” Remus won’t say more, he knows his information is something James or Shacklebolt probably told Sirius, something that isn’t that important to anyone, but Sirius’ news are worrying. “Is Lily ok?” 

 

“Fine, almost going stir crazy. She wanted you to go to the house last week, to help her with some of the potions she is working on, but you were in Germany and Dumbledore is restricting the floo’s use even more. ” 

 

Sirius is free to go to the house, never had restrictions on the Potter family, Remus on the other hand got sent to all the different neighbor countries, awful places, full of dark creatures and criminals. They’ve been apart for months, their patronus forbidden as soon as Dumbledore discovered them and Remus been more and more worried. 

 

He doesn’t see Sirius either, despite their living arrangements, and the fact they promised to look after each other. Remus misses their snuggling in the couch and the shared breakfast, he misses the sex too, but more importantly he misses them talking, instead of their short reports on their respective missions. 

 

“I’m going to shower and then I have another mission.” Sirius kisses his cheek, and gets up, he gulps the tea quickly and curses at how hot it is, before moving to his room. 

 

He only nods and closes his eyes, his tea will get cold before Sirius leaves and the lump in his throat won’t dissolve even when he falls asleep. Sirius doesn’t come back that night, or the next, when he does, he is all shaky and distracted, not looking at Remus eyes, much less talking to him. Remus fucking hates this war and the fact that he doesn’t know if he can ask where Sirius been, without fucking up the little of trust they still have. 

*******

“Let me fucking go!“ Sirius screams at him, eyes wild with terror. 

“What the hell do you think you will do there? Let Dumbledore figure it out, unless...“ Remus doesn't say, but Sirius gets it and punches him in the face. 

“He is my godson! Do you really think I would do that to Lily and James?“ Remus turns his face, looking back to the field, his eyes dark. 

“I have no idea where you've been or what you are doing/ when was the last time you looked in my face?“ 

Sirius crowds against Remus, hand pulling his hair to expose his neck. Remus slams into him, making them sprawl onto the grass, mouth seeking Sirius` with hopelessness. They root against each other, and Sirius makes Remus come, biting into his shoulder. It's almost like before, but it isn't enough.

“I… They are just Dumbledore`s missions, things I couldn't let James go, not after Harry was born.“ 

They stay there, minutes, hours, Remus isn't sure. When they go back to the apartment, Sirius tries to take Remus shirt and Remus refuses, darting to his room. They fight again, because Sirius is sure Remus has the dark mark and Remus is offended Sirius must see his wrists to believe instead of his word. 

Remus moves out, Sirius starts drinking more than ever. They don't see each other, not until James and Lily are both dead and at the service Remus can see, fleetingly, Sirius in the dark, hidden from the others. He will for a long time think about that day, wondering if he could have caught Sirius before he killed Peter.

At night, Remus dreams of their legs entwined, of feeling Sirius eyes in the dark. He never visits him in Azkaban, but sometimes he wishes he could go there. Look in Sirius face and know why the hell he didn't see it coming.

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you enjoyed this fic, I tried to make it angst, but I think I didn't get quite there. Also, the smut tried to crack trough, but I kept it at minimum.


End file.
